cramp!

Anyone who runs knows what it is to get a leg/foot cramp. In fact, many people whether they run or not have had this unpleasant experience. When you run regularly and do not drink enough water (say if you drink beer instead) you start getting leg cramps. Additionally, the more dehydrated you are the more frequently they occur and the worse they feel. What follows is my experience with cramping.

I'm rushing home. I really want to meet up with a friend I haven't had a chance to hang out with in awhile. First, I need to run and I had to work late unexpectedly. There's little time. Rush home, get changed, rush to the gym. Just 2 miles tonight. Today is supposed to be a recovery day an easy distance at an easy pace. I don't have time for recovery. I need to leave so I can drink beer. Alright fast 2 miles complete. Rush home. Again. Call my friend to finalize plans, take a shower and hit the road to meet up at the bar. So far so good.

It's a new bar for me. The layout is exactly what you picture a bar to be. There's the rail with the odd assortment of regulars, some tables, of various heights and sizes, spread throughout the floor and all in one room which also has a Jukebox and pool table. It is not crowded, but there are other people there. It is always more comfortable in a bar when there are multiple other groups present. This way it's not just your group and the bartender. There are no worries about eavesdropping, no having to deal with a bartender who is over eager to join the conversation, no feelings of "no one else is drinking should we be?" (not that I've ever had these feelings I just imagine most people would if the situation were to arise). Anyway back to the bar...

I find my friend and proceed to order a beer and gratefully munch on a few cheese fries he has already ordered. It was a good time. The atmosphere in the bar is pretty relaxed and there's no blaring music making it easy to talk and catch up. We talk for awhile have a couple beers and then it comes. Out of no where, as always, my right leg cramps. This is no ignorable point your foot up, then down and it will go away, cramp. This is a totally locked up, you are forced to stand because your leg has to be straightened, cramp. In other words this is intense. If I had been in the privacy of my home I would have cried out, cringing in pain and limped about the room mumbling inaudible profanities. Instead I'm at the bar. I have to attempt social compliance. Meanwhile my body forces me to stand when it is definitely more acceptable to be sitting. My friend is comfortably seated like a normal person eyes glancing around as we try to talk. I've already explained why I have to stand, but he wants to see if the other bar supporters have noticed. Fortunately, I don't see anyone looking. I try to sit, the pain has subsided a little. I sit down. Like a bomb went off underneath me I stand right back up. It's worse I probably yelped when I stood. Now people are looking. If I had been at the gym this could have been excused as normal behavior. But I'm at the bar. After trying to bear the pain I realize I have to walk it out. The only place to walk in this small bar is the bathroom which I just visited. As I'm hobbling to the bathroom I realize instead of looking more normal by going to the bathroom I look like something else is wrong with me. Now that I've stood abruptly twice and groaned in pain I'm going back to the bathroom and if that were not enough I am now walking oddly...like my bladder blew up or I've lost control of my bowels. This is bad. Once again I am not normal and I have subjected another friend to my deviance. Another failed attempt at social interaction. One day I'll get it right.

Running my bane. Running my existence.

-D